Sushi

Suddenly old stories of sushi and me came across my mind, well it's just a simple story between us. From the time when i was know nothing about sushi, to the sushi-expert me, (well not really expert).

When i was dating her, i remember she promised me she's gonna make sushi for me, hahahaha so from that time when I was about to meet her, I will keep thinking on how's the taste of the sushi she made for me.. But unfortunately till now, I never taste the sushi she made, perhaps I forgot why, but there's always being something happen..that keeping me from having the sushi T,T.. Hahaha my waiting for the sushi from my beloved ones continues till today....


Well when i was teaching sushi class, when i look at the girls making sushi for theirs beloved boyfriend, I feel touch by them, bring me back to my early days with her, hahahaha. Memories are always sweets when you look at them in a way.. Even thou I don't have my chance to taste the sushi, but the promised she make back then was really a wonderful memory now hahaha.

But I know, I won't have my chance to taste that sushi now, it will be not the same taste that i was hoping back there.. my feeling somehow probably gone.. So guys, do appreciate food that your gals made for you, especially they made them with their honest feeling ^^

Aaa~ don't get me wrong, just writing this out of blue, you know me, my heart changes a lot like wind, the blows freely~~ :D

So sushi n me is not about my love on Japanese things, but promises n memories of the past.

searching for the lost sushi~

Dear Heart

Dear heart....

can you please go and die?
i just cant stand this feeling anymore,
i just cant stand this pain anymore,
please show some mercy on me,

can you just drop dead and forget all the past?
i don't care if you want to move on or whatever,
but please forget those stupid things will ya?
don't keep crying inside...

isn't it enough?
what i had done to comfort you?
all those things i've done..
can you just rest in peace now?

what's wrong with you?
suddenly over sensitive?
suddenly longing for someone to be there for you?
isn't that too much??

you are lone heart,
know your place,
i wont be right if there's someone there for you,
you'll be stupid and numb.

so can you just die and rest peacefully now?
so i can continue my task and when it's over,
we'll go together to the place,
where no one can find us anymore...

i thought l had completely kill you in my last move,
but you sure really tough heart,
but please...
just drop dead....

life that i creating ahead is just for us,
you and me,
we create one soul that will wander,
all over the place like a lonely wolf..

so please, calm down..
please think of me...
when my task here finish...
we'll go together to the land of no one....

(grrr)

H.A

Freeman

Dear blog,

Lets be free~~ ^,^
Lets be happy~~^,^
Lets smile~~ ^,^
Lets live our life~~ ^,^

(guess wht i wrote thr?)

H.A

Blabber again and again

Dear blog...

i once have a thought of changing the way i post out my feeling here.. instead writing in normal way, how about trying to write in short and deep meaning words, well.. probably will lead to misunderstanding, hahaha well,who cares thou..

think again.. i'm not that creative to create few words to replace thousands of words hidden in my heart~~

cut the crap~~

Hurm family and friends.. i'm really glad that i'm being blessed with them. Well it's true there's lot type of people in this world...As each days passed, it wont be the same for each days that we've been through. There's time we feel down others feeling happy , there's time we happy but people around us feeling down. Well, it's not the same for different people thou. Well, about people who being our friend, it doesn't matter who came to your life and to be your friend and hang out together. Well, this is not like an issue of talking about true friend, but the real things is honesty. There people who get to know you just for their convenience, as when they want your help they will find you... Well these things are not that bad thou, like i say there's lot kind of people in this world, may be that's just their way. Well as long as when you got trouble and when you seek them, they willing to help you as much as their can, then that's shall be all right, and you should really forget them if they don't even bother to listen to your problem.

Suddenly i blabbering about friends right? hahahaha i guess i just get effected by a manga that i was reading for last few days. how about my friends? hahaha they are all great, so far all my friends are there for me, but you know, it just me that i'm the type who rarely shares my stress with others, when it reaches to critical condition, i just spill it out like i was jokingly stress with funny face and funny way to say it out. Just like when i'm down about someone, when i can't no longer keep inside, i just call and say the person name out of blue when i was hanging out with them, with some blur and "nothing-ness" face thou. hahahha (yeah something like out of blue, i say "goggle" i referring to i want to buy the goggle but i can't coz no money but i want it so much, or "AE86" mean i want that car but now the car is no longer exist.. and common words "Stella~~ T,T" means i miss my time with stella, but why she had to leave me, i'm sad, i'm down~~ i missed her so much~~ why i can't be together with her just like other people~~ [stella is no body, i just randomly put the name as example]).. hahah i am super weird isn't it??? :p

that's all for now, thanks ^^






Enjoy the song~~

H.A

Community Service~

Dear blog~

Yeah i know really few people came here and listening me bicthin' around, but still i wanted to do this...

Well if you were looking for pet, please do bumps to this link ok?

http://rescue2rehome.blogspot.com

found this blog when i was looking for Chinchilla to be adopt. Well surely this blog not giving away chinchilla, but it's about stray pets that being rescue and to be adopted... so feel free to provided this lost souls a home.......


that's all, this community message is written by me.. lol

H.A

Why....

Dear blog,

When i'm feeling extremely happy, extremely sadness will comes after that. Either with a reason or not, this circle always haunted me all the time, well so many example that i had encounter in the past prove this theory, u knew it and i knew it, if u look back to my life, it had been that way since long long time ago. "i don't care?" it just my own excuse i made to my self... too much feeling i kept inside...

i'm not good in expressing my feeling on my face or in my daily life, i just spacing out and listen to songs... when i mad, i stay still there and speak no words, (well there's limit thou till i seal it with my punches ^,^), same as when i sad. I made lot of excuse to accept my feeling now, keep telling my self that "i'm okay" "it's okay" "i don't mind" "i don't care" when deep inside me it feels like hell... i'm being jealous with people who can express their feeling freely while my feeling hidden in the riddle...

i don't know my self anymore, i don't know how i used to be, i forget my self in the past... yeah people changes... i;m getting tired... even now i am feeling upset and i don't know why or may be this "i don't know why i feel sad" is just another excuse of mine to forget why the reason i being down coz if i remember the reason i will feel more depressed..

i don't want to be someone who keep on bicthing over his bad luck or fate, i don't really care but sometimes its too much till i down on my feet and asking "why....why....why..." and keep asking it till i fell asleep. I hate being pitifull, i want way out of this... this is not me!!!

is this feeling being an adult?? depress and stress?? i don't want to grow up T,T

forgive my childish thought... even i can wrote here, but still things i cant write here.....

whac' ya lookin' at???

H.A

The most meaningful 7th of March

Dear blog...

yes last few days was my birthday, and Jenny the wan who first wish me my birthday, thank you ^^....

i went back to puchong around noon, my sis came pick me from hostel, she's otw back from buying cake from SJ, yeah mum with her, she bought a hand bag with her =,=" mum surely can't resist shopping isn't she?? hahaha

well when reach puchong, all 3 of my elder sis were there, my bro in law n my soon will be bro in law were there too, my sis in law also there but my elder bro away to jakarta. they bought caramel cake from secret recepies~~ nice~~~~ n mum cook nasi dagang~~ T,T so niceee~~ thanks every body T,T..

well i overnight there, ah one more, kids keep bully me there~ hahahaha especially hannah =,="
and sarah got hamster from akmal, hahaha the kids enjoys them self too, and they blow the candle together with me hahahaha.. and at nigth mika come crawl to me, -,-" well few more days he wil be 8 moth something, hahahaa..

well to think again, this is the first time i spent my birthday like this, and i really thankful, it was super fun ^^

next day when came back to cyber, izzat n chu bought choc cake from secret recepies and they tot my birthday was on tht day hahahaha. well thanks guys ^^ (sure they mistaken coz i never put my birthday on my facebook")

well, thanks everybody, this year my birthday was the most meaningful day ^^, it was a great present from all of you to me, think again, i feel like i want to cry coz i was really happy, thanks T,T

that's all, thank you ^^

fall asleep on my desk again ^^

H.A