Hi, tonight is cold right? People start to go and gather with their family. Enjoying nice warm meal together with candle light's shines their happy faces.. I walked alone in the streets, i saw them... i don't envy them...somehow i feel glad, to see they all smiles.. Somehow i feel warmth flowing from my eyes... am i crying? i don't know why... i keep walking alone, seeing all people enjoying them self, either with their family or their friends... Should i go back and enjoy with my family? No..somehow i feel different.... i feel like i wasn't there..... i feel like i'm just only a photo frame there... in my heart.. there's something gone...
i keep on dragging my feet, forgetting about spending my time with my family.. they would definitely forgot of my absences... i don't mind.. as long as they were happy just like everybody else... my steps stopped at the junction... i see a kitten.... dirty and hungry....... i pick it up.... and walk with me.... somehow i can hear a cat calling for her child... yeah the child with me now... then i left the kitten with her mother.... continue walking.. with no where to go...
snow start falling..... i know what i had lost... i lost something that i can give, but i cannot feel the same thing when people gave it back to me.... i don't care.. i will keep on walking.... that's the only thing i can do now... this coldness... i don't care already.......because i know... my heart is dead...
people pass by, i smile and wave to them... wishing them all best in their days.... help them.. to find their path... but who will help me? hahahaha
some people might realize what's hidden beneath my smiles, but they often to drown in my tears... finally they loose them self... i've driven away all people seen my tears, so i won't hurt them... no one can help me...yeah... i've already fallen to this far.... only you blog can help me...
i keep on walking now.... till i see the light...shines to me.. guide me to where i suppose to be next.... leaving the past behind... with no regret...hatred...vengeful.. i leave the past as it is...
that's all.. thank you blog....
Ahh...the lights.....
H.A
